Friday, November 21, 2008

hola(o-la)... =P

fuhh...i started this at 12.35am 21/11/2008...let's see how much time i need to finish it...hahahah :P i guess it takes time since i am on FaceBook and games. well, just wanted to say something while i am here in LCCT
(low-cost carrier's for the Air Asia only). Just wanted something to do besides Facebook-ing and Gaming... :) i am damn boring and i don't know how long i can stand of not sleeping. i am very sleepy, a bit of headche, and a bit of muscle-ache here and there...waaa!! T_T

what's hot today? nothing! haha. i mean maybe my hot-tempered are getting worse. because of all the works i have to do. i have no time to think of anything else besides working, and working and working. on what purpose? ACTIVITIES! as much as i HATE activities, i love the working environment. oh no. i am talking craps again. i just said said in a way or another that i hate working now i said i love it. confused? me too! it's what you get when u didn't sleep for hours and making yourself tired by emptying and packing the room! damn!
(kalo balek naek sem nt bilik tak renovate, mmg la..i will kill the CAT! huh..ape lah salah kucing tuh)

fuh. i miss K. we haven't been chatting for like a week, or less. haha :P i know he's busy. but the last word he said to me the last day we chat, has made me confused. well, i am a kind of girl you will find so slow in picking up words from people. i am a blur one! be straightforward to me. jangan nak putar belit mcm ular or wire telefon or even rambut lepas bangun tdo. huhu. =_="
where are you K? hey, we didn't fight. he's just too busy. well, this will be my last day online since back at home i don't have any internet connection
('cause everyone's using the mobile phone..huh). so, i might not be in contact with him. oh, we never used the SMS sytem. haha :D 'cause i don't have his number yet. ngaaa~

i feel like a fool here. talking to myself in my mind
(what they say? monologue is it). and smiling and laughing alone. while looking interesting-ly at my laptop. sucks! i need real people. i need human with brain and IQ to talk to. i need a person who has IQ level more than 1. even a baby will do for now. haha :))
i wanted a companion here. it's so boring to go back home alone. no one to talk to. it's not my first time though. but i do feel this way sometimes. it's not the same when you go for shoppings or movies or hanging out and lepak-ing alone. it's no fun here in airport. sape ckp best airport?? cepat angkat kaki kiri!! huhu T_T

there IS someone next to me here. not exactly next to me. but at the same table. he wanted to use the power socket too. and me? i brought along my extension. haha. 'cause i forgot to pack it along with other stuff. in the end making me stuffing it into my bag. gosh, luckily i have enough of spaces in my bacpack. i am too shy to start any conversation with him. yes, it's a HIM. and chinese. all we said to each other are "he: can i plug my adaptor here? me: yeah, sure. he: thank you :) me: oh, my pleasure." that's all and then he sat there typing and looking at the screen of his laptop. no words coming out from either of us. complete silence. except the cleaner here in LCCT are vacuuming the floor and the sound is very irritating, annoying. rasa nak sumbat jer tikus dalam vacuum tuh. huhu =_="

the airport are getting emptier. no more a group or a bunch of people making noises. it makes me sleepy though 'cause i can't stand silence. not that i like noises, but complete silence is a NO NO! i like to see people's behavior around me. the way they smile, talk, laugh. the sad look. the happy look. i wish i have a DSLR now to capture the moments. :) lalala~ it's getting boring and more boring. i think i can sleep with my eyes open and typing at the same time. erkk? SCARY! mama, please. next time. no more staying up late here in airport. i hate airport. but i can't wait for morning. i can see the sun rise from above. aww, how nice. again, i wish i have DSLR now. ok mama. i take back my word. buy me a plane ticket on morning flight. the best is 7am. so i can see the sunrise and morning from above. :) and take some great photos :D

ouh, my head's getting heavier. my eyelid even heavier. damn! i don't want to sleep! i want to stay awake. i want STARBUCKS. but they only have COFFEE BEAN here. :( i never buy any drinks from COFFEE BEAN. i don't know what to buy. dira said CARAMEL LATTE's nice. but, is it as nice as CARAMEL MACCHIATO?? =( now i miss STARBUCKS! huwaaaa!! T_T

i can't wait to be home. then, pick the EVH people this Sunday for our trip in Kuching. i am very nervous of the program 'cause i am the one who arranged the places. not all. but most of the 'jalan2' places. huhu. i hope they will like it and enjoy every seconds in Kuching. :) unfortunately, i might not have my DSLR before the trip 'cause of the limited time to go shop for it. huhu. nevermind, as long i get mine before 2nd semester starts. :)

okay, i think i have enough of typing this. i need to stop. oh, yeah. i learnt new sentence. it's in spanish though.

Las posibilidades no tienen final which means the possibilities are endless. what possibilities? it's mine to keep :) haha..

till then. CIAO!! :)

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

grrrrr...~!!! No More Immune For Me Please!

hey there...

i just finished my Immunology paper and it SUCKS
BIG TIME!!!!!!!! i looked like a FOOL staring at the questions(it took me 10 minutes to realize i have to answer no matter what..huh!). Speechless(of course since i can't make any noise in the Exam Hall) and feeling numb, i feel like someone has taken my brain out of my head. i feel empty. NADA. EMPTY! arrghhh!! the questions made me feel like i never learn Immunology. it's too tough for me. not to mention. "SILA JAWAB DUA SOALAN DALAM BAHAGIAN B DI BUKU JAWAPAN YANG BERASINGAN YANG TELAH DISEDIAKAN". in my thought "yes! only 2 essays!". but then when the lecturer said we can start, i am like "damn! answer 2 essays and no choices???!! wtfish??!!" the lecturer made it compulsory to answer both essays and he only have 2 essays questions for us.. T_T

really..i am DEAD. and now you are reading some blog posted by a ZOMBIE of Ain. she can't RIP since she have to wait for the result. then, she might RIP or she can continue living as Vampire
(if she passes the paper, she might awake from death). arrghh!

one more paper left. very excited. then i can go home and release all the tensions in my mind. i have to go to the gym though. lose some weight, sweats a lot so i can have all the toxin out of me and be fresh again. living in KL with full of almost every type of pollutions, really tenses my body. huhu. i need fresh air.

Eco-Cultural Sarawak Programme. 23rd to 27th of November. Environmental Health Club of UKM KL. 40 participants. hmmmm. stressing. so many things to be done. afraid. of the outcome. afraid. the participants are not satisfy. afraid. of losing my mind and temper. afraid. of giving up the programme. i really so not into it now. but i am the on kuching-ian in the bunch. i have to help. it's the courtesy of the host. kuching is my place. and will always be. it's the best place all time. i really miss home. :(

i guess i have said enough of what i want to say in the first place. forgive me if i offend you
(about the eco-cultural). it's just what i feel. and i feel like posting it here.

till then, ciao!

Monday, November 10, 2008

i LOVE you!! :)

ey peepz~~

i have been updating my blog so frequently lately. not that i am so into this thing
(i am but not just it! LOL), but there are so many things happen and i think the only way for me to share it or to let it out of my mind is by blogging. it is fun you know, i mean blogging. i am glad i did it. well, the reason is not for people to read, but priority is to get all those things out of my head. not that i hate keeping it in mind, but it feels right to write them in blogs and read, well, re-read over and over again. not forget to mention, smiling and frowning or even pondering and imagining on those memories. it is funny, sometimes. when u laugh at your own writing. haha. playing with your own emotions is COOL!

oh yeah, this blog entrance actually to tell you guys how much fun i had last Saturday. haha. me, Ain, always about fun. no matter what condition i am in(fyi, i am still in finals weeks. hahaha!) oh yeah! with the same reason we went to MID, but this time, shopping is all about Rangga. Rangga who? he's Put lover. haha. yeah, Put's dearest boyfriend! went shopping for a converse pair of sneakers. Rangga needs it for his upcoming band performance back in Bandung, Indonesia. did i mention that Put's Indonesian? Yeah, she's from Riau. i don't know why Rangga wants it from Malaysia though. but he said it was cheaper. yeah, right. all in all, whatever happens we still have to get a GREEN CONVERSE SNEAKERS. GREEN!! luckily, there was a green pair. oh, forget to mention, we went to TIMES SQUARE earlier before we headed to KLCC for CONVERSE outlet. as usual, we had lunch at TS' Mcd, then we walk for a while around TS, just looking around. Put was searching for a necklace for Rangga. and she wanted only a V-shaped guitar on it. fuhh, God just loves me 'cause we found it finally. haha.

she got him that necklace which i thought quite expensive. and suddenly,
SUDDENLY(!!), Put asked me whether i wanted a pair for myself. it was very surprising you know, for a friend asking that question. then i said i am okay with it IF only she had one for herself. then we decided we should get one for both of us, to be FAIR. so, at last, she bought us this very CUTE necklace with LOVE on it which can be separated into half. we carved our name at each halves. it's so SWEET right? for bestfriends to have that necklace. :) Put told me i have to wear it always, and care for it and if it's lost, i lost her. Awww, i LOVE my BESTFRIEND! :) thanks a LOT, Put!!

after we had the necklace
(we had to wait like 1/2 an hour for the necklace to be readily carved, not to forget to add another 45minutes of lunch.duh!!) we head to KLCC. the taxi charged us RM13 TS-KLCC. wtfish??!! oh, nevermind. it was bad traffic too though. taxi driver was forgiven. we went straight to the CONVERSE outlet, bought the sneakers, head to the Post Office, then back to Memory Lane to pack the sneakers, then again back to the Post Office and post that sneakers and necklace. dang! tired! after that, we had ourselves a slice of MODESTO'S PIZZA each. we didn't eat there, i mean, at the Modesto's but we went to the lake at first floor. just sit there, chilled out, eat pizza, talking craps, laughing. we had fun though! :) we are so tired of walking around so we decided to went straight back to college. fuh! another RM25 for taxi from KLCC-KG BARU-JLN TEMERLOH. again, bad traffic on weekend, taxi driver was forgiven.

yeah, i had fun, thanks to Putri. always, thanks to her. we talked about K a lot. she said some things, which i guess had changed the way i think. talking about K. we are now totally fine. he's always okay, and i am already okay. LOL. it was just so immature of me. i mean K is always fine. he never mad at me, he said. he just think that he doesn't need to reply to any of my immature sayings. yeah,
STUPIDO me~! nevermind, we are okay now. i am so thrill with it! we just had some chats. and i am really glad we talked the way we used to :)

alright peepz, i am so done with this entry. till next time yeah~! oh yeah,
I LOVE YOU, PUTRI~! *hugs n kisses* bestfriend forever!

p/s : Put, this necklace is so cute i can't get enough of looking at it! THANKS! :D

Thursday, November 6, 2008's a trend..and i HATE it! :(


this post is regardly to reply what Farah said in her latest blog post. yeah. Farah was right.
DSLR's a trend now and IS very overrated. i hate the fact too, Farah. i started playing with SLR camera 2 years back. at that time, it's just a hobby, i mean for fun. just clicking the snap button on a friend's SLR and there you are, how i started to fall in love with photography. well, it was more than that. i like the art of photography. i like it when it is hard to learn how to take good photos. there were lomos too, i like them but i prefer SLR. at that moment, i promised myself i'll get one of it one day. which actually took me 2 years(now, though) to have it. for some reason, i can't afford it. not even my parents. now, they do. so, thank God!

now, when i can afford to get one, it feels wrong. something isn't right. know what? cause
EVERYONE is having one. i don't like the fact that at the time i seriously want to involve myself in photography, it's become a trend. i hate possers! i thought for a moment. can i just wait another year or so, for all the possers to say bye to DSLR and hie to a new trend? then i said, naah. just ignore what people said. you know what you want. and you'll get it. :) yes Ain!

and fyi, not all DSLR owners know exactly the anatomy and physiology of DSLR. not that i am the master of it. but everytime i ask them, all i have for anwers are "i usually and only use the auto and manual mode. i didn't use other modes". "i only took pictures with this
(finger pointing on the mode button)". so, wth?! so, i figure out. this is really a huge trend. none i meet knows exactly why they wanted DSLR in the first place. it's just a trend. and all trend will have their ups and downs. and i think for a moment, "yeah, let it be" only the true one, the die-hard-fan really cares about the art of photography. others? LAME.

i agree. DSLR is a trend now. only true fans stay with it forever!

and to my surprise, K replied my YM. eventhough it's just a simple saying, it made me happy. knowing he's okay and i am not. huhu :( still, i wanted to say so many things to him. hopefully he will totally forgive me, SOON enough! huhu

till then reader(s), CIAO!

clearing the mind~! MID time! :)


today was fun! me and Put went to MID and go crazy on shoppings
(just Put, not me). she spent like crazeeeeeee! really crazy. happy for her anyway. and thanks a lot to her for today. thanks Put! everything was on her. the meal. the cab. except for STARBUCKS(which i am dying for, craving for the caramel machiato as the one i had at starbucks BORDER was too bad). LOL. thanks thanks thanks. there were so many things to share, to talk about. i even opened up to her about K. she's the one you'll go to though if you are in my shoes. seriously! i felt relieved after sharing it to her. and FARAH too. thanks Farah :)

it feels like years since we had the fight. i miss him around. am i in LOVE? no, i don' think so. it's the same feeling i had when i had a fight with my friends and we didn't contact each other like for a while. it's the same feeling. i am just more worried about K cause of his condition
(under medication thingy).

so, what did i bought? you know, if you are going somewhere nearer, like TS or BB or PAVI, whatever you bought is no BIG DEAL. but now, i am talking about MID. which is in fact, far from my place. well, we act like the rich. took the cab from here to MID. then the same way as from MID back to our place. but nevermind, Put paid for the cab. haha. thanks Put! oh ya, i bought nothing!
NOTHING! i mean not that i did't buy anything, i did though. but just some toiletries at GUARDIAN. and meals(which were on PUT, yeah, were, the LUNCH and DINNER, both on her!!). besides those stated, nothing more. it was more likely that i accompanied Put for her shoppings. she bought this very nice knitted purple MNG vest, with a match of white GIORDANO shirt, a black n red ELLE heels, a match purple-pink necklace from ENVEE. yeah, that was much of it. very nice though. and damn EXPENSIVE! haha. i wish i can shoppe like her. but since i requested a very quite much from my dad(i requested a Sony Alpha 200W DSLR Cam), so i can't expect him to give me some pocket money for shoppings. dang! but hey, it's okay cause i will still get my DSLR whatever happens. haha. *evil laugh*

and as we got to the guitar shop, which i always did everytime i went to MID, i saw this very attractive and sexy guitar, an amp, a guitar stand and a HOT guitar case, they all went straight to my
WILL-BE-GRAB LIST. hehehe. again. another very much from my dad. less clothing budget. more stuff budget. LOL. well, i still need to buy some new clothes and jeans though, and not to forget some sort of a feminine attire(not just some sort of casual shirts or clothing). oh, y? because i had a plan with Put, that i will go to her place which in Riau in a few months time(of course on hols laaa!) then together we hit Bandung and Jakarta. right Put? :P

and not forget to mention, i am so FEMININE today! haha. i wear this blouse/dress from my previous college's dinner with a jeans and my previous course dinner heels! wow ain! u have grown up! LOL. yeah. i mean it when i say i look wayyyyyy different than i used too. no casual/sporty shirts or sneakers today. just no handbags. i still can't find the one i really like. i am very choosy in everything. and very high taste. haha. i only wanted the best. not just some RM10 or below RM100 bags. see. i told you. i am very choosy. and very sarcastic. my mom sure knows it! hehehe.

i haven't told my mom yet how i look like going out today. and we did'nt took any pictures though. which is a waste i guess. no memories of me being very FEMININE for the first time. LOL. if my mom sees it, sure she will hugs and kiss the whole of my face. hahaha. AIN, u look so NICE in IT!
(i won't fall for what she said as that's the way she try to pull me off from my usual style and make me into some feminine lady, as if i will). haha. evil me. sorry mom. i still have the sporty me. it doesn't mean i change to a whole new AIN. no no no. not yet. maybe in 2009? haha. yeah right.

as a conclusion
(the way we conclude it in school time. hehe), today was a real fun! eventhough i am very exhausted. it was fun though. not worrying about K, exams or anything. just money. haha. till then peepz! ciao! :)

p/s: i wanted a short hair for new year!! weeee~!!! :)

arguing is sucks~! and finals even worse!


it's the 4th day of finals(which is actually 3 weeks in total, with 8 days of gap). i feel so damn miserable(not that i don't do my revision). know y? cause i don't have the exam fever(boo-yah! i supposed to have it like a day before exam). and this scares me off cause i only feel so very damn calm when things are getting very bad. very very bad. and guess what? it was bad! cause i have this feeling that i will FAIL my biochemistry and physiology(just pray that i won't fail). ngaaaa~!! really, i never had this failing-the-papers feeling, you know. and it really freaks me out. tsk tsk tsk.

now, back to my non-finals life. everything seems perfectly normal with K(which i don't think i prefer to mention his full name here). and K is not his initial, it's H. so, K. what about him? he's really a nice guy. a good friend. a best friend indeed(no further details of K will be provided) until we got into this UGLY fight. we fought about this stupid anti-depressing pills(he's on this medication, up for some reasons, too personal to state here). i guess it's my PMS to be blame too. i was so emotional about it, which i think because of the PMS. i should think about his condition before i could be a genius and said something(which i foolishly thought will calm him) which in turn i realized will not comfort him but makes things worse! (stupido me!) how stupid for me to bring up the stories(which made him took the medication) and then acted as genius saying all those STUPID advise which everyone had told him before me(again, stupid stupid stupid!) and now, he's not even YM-ing me, and for some stupid reasons too, i dont have his number now! arrghhh!! i feel very bad!

i hope all those things i said won't make him take any pills. i don't want to be his other reason to take those pills. enough with his previous experience which made him took it in the first place. damn! i feel worse now. i can't contact him. he's not YM-ing(i am not sure if he's online or not cause he's always invisible) i don't have his number now. i don't know how to reach him. i don't even have his friends' numbers(which is even worse) . i left hundreds of offline messages on his YM. he's not replying any of it which makes me wonder what have/had happen to him. i don't like this feelings cause everytime i have bad feeling, it turns out to be true. help me God! i hope he's just busy with his life(he turned out to be a workaholic since the bad experience). i hope he's fine. i hope it's just the fact that he's busy with his work, like he always did(he rarely online on YM when he's too busy with works). and i miss him. i miss the way he always makes me smile and laugh. i miss his sarcastism. i miss his narcissism. i just miss my friend and i want him back in my life. where are you K? i am really sorry. nothing more i can say. just sorry. i am so sorry.

well peepz. that's all for now i guess. and i am really miserable thinking about K. i wish it never happen(foolish said). i am out of here! till next time!